How often do you start a
new and improved plan to be, do and have something in life that you
want? Do you start the day promising to avoid the pastries for
breakfast, the chips for lunch and the fried foods for dinner only to
start negotiating your way out of your plans as soon as you dry off
after your shower?
For a lot of people,
making a plan and keeping that plan to do what is right and what is
going to get you where you want to be is easily sabotaged by your
inner negotiator. Your inner negotiator tells you that you need
things that you don't, that it is alright to cheat and it is
justified because of reasons A, B, and C. Your inner negotiator lies
to you sweetly in your ear and reminds you that you are too tired and
over worked to go to the gym. Your inner negotiator tells you that
three cookies when no one is looking won't hurt your plans for weight
loss or make you fat. Your inner negotiator coaxes you to buy things
you can't afford and encourages you to do things that you know will
only lead to trouble.
Many of you aren't even
aware that there is a little voice in your head that is yelling “what
about my needs?” That voice pokes holes in your biggest plans and
wants what it wants now. Your inner negotiator has no ability to
delay gratification or to see that change is good. Your inner
negotiator is crafty and very persuasive because he believes what he
is selling you- Live in the moment, let tomorrow take care of itself
and let’s go get a mocha!
The best way to manage
your inner negotiator is to have some negotiation skills of your own.
When the little voice in your head coddles you and tells you that it
is perfectly fine for you to do something you know is wrong, rebut
his argument. Remind yourself and your inner negotiator that you have
goals and you have got to do what it takes to accomplish them. When
your inner negotiator tantrums like a two-year-old in the candy isle,
take him by the hand and walk calmly out of the area. Clear your head
and fill your thoughts with visions of your success. Do something,
anything that quells the negotiating. Train yourself to automatically
respond to the negotiating and before long you will have taught your
inner negotiator that you are the Chief Officer of all things you.
It doesn't take long to
change the voice in your head. It won't take long for you to see the
results that you are looking for and the results are a more powerful
motivation than your negotiator telling you that you have needs that
aren't being met. At some point, everyone who has achieved an
important goal has realized that there is a moment when all the
effort, all the sacrifice and all of the negotiating becomes worth
it.